Inward Journey

Introvert/Extrovert - Episode 33

Kevin Bergin Season 1 Episode 33

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Kevin:

Hello and welcome to our Inward Journey podcast. I'm Kevin and I'm here with

Jeannene:

Janine. And we're here together on Wanjuriland making this recording today.

Kevin:

Great. And so we are. And today we're going to talk about something.

Jeannene:

We're going to talk about extroverts and introverts.

Kevin:

Interesting.

Jeannene:

We'll have a conversation about it. Yeah.

Kevin:

Yeah. We're going to have a conversation about it. It would be true to say that we're both introverts. Have we started? I thought we were

Jeannene:

going to stop for a minute. Hang on a

Kevin:

second everybody, stop listening. We've both got light glasses, so you know, if you put them down it's hard to see them again. And, um, you're in the kitchen and you're, I don't know if you were still searching for the glasses, but you were describing yourself as a crazy woman. No, you're not. Oh, well, maybe you are, but then I am as well.

Jeannene:

You're a crazy woman.

Kevin:

No, crazy man.

Jeannene:

It doesn't matter. I just felt like that in that moment. Yeah. Uh, crazy person. Cause I was having a. A day. I was having a day. What's your understanding of an introvert or an extrovert? Kevin?

Kevin:

An extrovert is somebody who just keeps going, going and going and going and going. And I already know some of the things you're gonna say, but anyway, an introvert just me is, uh, I'm have a limited amount of that kind of energy that flamboyance. I can do it and I can choose to do it and I could enjoy it. Then just about the time when often people go, yeah, that was great. What are we doing next? I go, yeah, you know what? I'm going home because I've had enough. And that means I need to be on my own and recharge my batteries.

Jeannene:

I'm very much the introvert myself, which is interesting because I don't think you would Or people might know that they might not say that about you either, but the way I understand it is that an introvert, no, that a true introvert is where the person gets their energy from, from being alone and an extrovert gets their energy from being with people. So they're quite comfortable in lots of company and all the time. And I think. That we all can have introverted and extroverted parts of self, but there's often one that you're more leaning towards, and some people are quite on the extreme with that, that they need downtime, alone time, if there's a lot of company, and those people with a little bit of company need more company. They're more extroverted people.

Kevin:

Really good for me to know. I'm an introvert, although my tendency is towards that, because otherwise I'll feel like there's something wrong with me. Everybody else wants to keep going and do whatever they're doing and get really excited and I've had enough.

Jeannene:

So it's a helpful insight.

Kevin:

It is, yes. So I don't feel bad about it, and it's been really useful in recovery. Because

Jeannene:

you know,

Kevin:

I hear, I hear other people say, Oh yeah, no, I really, I can't even go out. I can't go in much bands because there's alcohol and I can't go to a pub. And I'm sitting there thinking, yeah, you can. You just need to know when it's time for you to withdraw. And I have a couple of rules for that. One is, we've just been talking about, that was fun. I'm going to hear out enough. The other one, particularly when I'm with people who are drinking, um, is, you know, When they start telling the same stories as the same jokes again, I just say thanks a lot. I had a great night. See you later

Jeannene:

We might call that other parts of self that's had enough at that stage as well fair enough But I think there is an element of when If you're listening to your body, knowing when you are energised and need to stay with the crowd and that's exciting and really serves you and looks after you and energises you. And at times where it's like, I need downtime, I need my space, I need to be alone.

Kevin:

Yeah, and it varies a lot.

Jeannene:

I think it does.

Kevin:

Yeah, so I don't necessarily know when I'm doing something or when I go somewhere.

Jeannene:

You don't know until you know.

Kevin:

Yeah, that's right. I don't know. But I'm thinking about maybe something more than just going out to a concert. Something like traveling. With somebody actually. I do most of my traveling on my own. Very happily. So I can't really talk too much about that. But I meet other people while I'm traveling. Because of course you do. And of course that's a joy. And you get to talk to them. But I'm really happy that I can, without too much fuss, say, That was great, thanks, I'm off down the road now. Knowing that I'm probably never going to see them again. And that's it, I'm going to go and do some different things. I don't know what that is, is that introvert or is that? This is how we ended up talking about it in counselling. Because that's right, because I wanted to know, If that was something about my character or stuff that happened to me when I was a kid or was it my need to actually withdraw and recharge my batteries?

Jeannene:

Well, sometimes it can be a bit of both. I mean

Kevin:

I never say that.

Jeannene:

How would you know, Kevin, whether you wanted to withdraw and spend time alone or when it was Too much and

Kevin:

unhelpful for you. How would I know? Jazik, exactly what you said. I'd feel uncomfortable. Like, I know the lady can see us, but you know, I'm twitching my body. Start to twitch. Yeah, and I'd have that. Oh, yeah. Yeah, I'd have that gnome.

Jeannene:

A gnome? A

Kevin:

gnome.

Jeannene:

A gnome.

Kevin:

Yeah. Sit on my shoulder. Tell us about

Jeannene:

the gnome.

Kevin:

Well, it's like a, I guess when I was young it was a survival thing that would take me out of various places and make me safe. Now it's um, you know, when I get distressed, which is what happens to me when I've had enough and I don't leave and I'm not listening, it will start telling me things about other people. Myself. Rather nasty things, rather vicious things.

Jeannene:

Okay.

Kevin:

So yeah, so I turn it off by, actually that's not true. I deal with it by acknowledging it and then by withdrawing and being on my own.

Jeannene:

Okay. Yeah.

Kevin:

Okay.

Jeannene:

So it sounds like the voice serves you but differently.

Kevin:

Yeah, I can feel my body relaxing as I say that. Okay. Yeah. Ah. Yeah.

Jeannene:

It's interesting because it goes back to the listening thing and noticing your body and being in tune with what's actually happening for you. It's interesting because I would Say I'm an introvert, I get my energy from being alone, except I can be quite expressive. When I've run groups, I quite enjoy that and I can be quite extroverted. Within counseling, I can be quite animated, those sorts of things. However, after a certain amount of time, I need some downtime. And if we've had People that have stayed here from interstate, if they're staying in our home, and particularly if that's for longer periods, I know that I'm really comfortable when they leave, because I'm really wanting that time on my own. And one of the things that I do now because we have a lot of family that have been in from out of state. And then when they come and stay, I make sure that I have some time on my own whilst they're here as well. So I, I put that into the schedule that I'll be doing this and I'll catch up with you later. Feel free to go and do something. So I know that I do that because I think I just find And the presence of someone often can be demanding, not that they're demanding, but I feel their presence demanding on me. And so if I have that downtime, then I can take that pressure off myself.

Kevin:

But it's a, I don't know. So it's, but then I don't want to be on if, if you, if I was to be asked, so would you rather be on your own or with other people, I would say I'd rather be with other people. It's weird, isn't it? Because then I'll go and be with other people, and depending on how that is, which I guess is really important. You know, I may, like, Oh, that's weird. If it's some kind of celebration thing, then my energy is going to be limited. But I remember, you know, going to take pictures of bands. I could be there for 30 minutes or maybe three hours, and it didn't bother me, but I was, I had a different focus from everybody else watching the concert.

Jeannene:

Yeah.

Kevin:

So yeah, it's an interesting thing.

Jeannene:

I also think that it's healthy. And worthy around having a long term plan, short term plan around, yeah, have people over and be in their company all the time. Many of us can survive that wherever, ever we sit on the continuum, but long term plan, having company. all the time going away for long periods of time when you need a break or being isolated when you need company again is a risk that is probably worth thinking about ahead of time.

Kevin:

Yep.

Jeannene:

I like on term planning.

Kevin:

I don't like having people in my space for weeks and weeks and weeks. So, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, When I think about it, I think it's complicated. It's me. I'm complicated.

Jeannene:

That's humans.

Kevin:

Yeah, I, I'm so near that, yeah. Well, you could,

Jeannene:

you could say that, You're complicated. You could say that humans are complicated, but I like to say that they're interesting, that we're layered and that yes, I like to be curious about them. But I also think that it's worth knowing the parts that make up me and I can respond to them differently as I can with other people. Hmm. I think knowing about whether you're introverted or extroverted is really a healthy part of understanding yourself. And I think with knowing about what's my preferred way of being or the way I process externally, Then that helps me for things like in gatherings of people and also at meetings. Let me explain. So if you think about it, if you're with a group of people and you're in a meeting, so whether it's a work, whether it's an NA, whether it's a sports group, whatever it is, group of friends, perhaps

Kevin:

could be in the

Jeannene:

bank, could be in the bank. You had a bank experience and you're going on about it. Oh my goodness, now you have to tell the people. No,

Kevin:

I don't. Yes, you do. I'm embarrassed. No. There's people listening.

Jeannene:

That would be true. She might

Kevin:

listen.

Jeannene:

She might listen. She won't

Kevin:

know. She won't know. So I had to go into the bank. I don't go into banks. Because we don't need to, do we, anymore. It's all on my phone or on my computer. Anyway, I won't go into the reasons why I have to go into the bank, but I, you know, I had to. Well, I will. I had to get myself, um, To be part of an organization, to put money in, take money out, all that sort of stuff. So we'd arranged for me to go in there and take some ID, and I went in, and this woman serving me, and she's helping me do it, filling in the forms, and we've done all that, helping me set up the app, so that I could do, deal with everything on my phone, manage the account on my phone. She was looking at my details on the computer screen and said Something about my birth, oh she said, yeah that's right, she said, So you, you, you were born on a Saturday. I said, oh really? She said, yes you were born on a Saturday. I said, oh, okay, yeah I was born at ten past one. And she said, Oh, wow. I was born in 10 parts 1 and 2. And I said, Oh, fantastic. And then, I just, then she told me that it was just her birthday had just gone by. I said, Congratulations. She said, Nah, I don't want to go any further. I want to stay there. I'm 50 now. So, um, and we just carried on, finished off what we were doing. And just as I was about to leave, she gave me a card with her phone number on it. And said if you need any help. So I walked out of the bank, said goodbye, walked out of the bank, walking down the road again. Have I just been hit on? Or was she actually doing a bank thing? I have no idea, but it felt pretty good.

Jeannene:

Yeah. Yeah. Well, let's just go with, you've been hit on. I think so,

Kevin:

yeah.

Jeannene:

But I can't imagine this woman giving her number out to everybody. Well, it was a

Kevin:

work number.

Jeannene:

Okay.

Kevin:

Yeah, but yeah. And a name, too. And putting, putting the card down in front of me and pointing to her name and saying, if you need any help, we're okay, you know.

Jeannene:

It might be part of their policy, Kevin, to have familiar face that you know. It could be. But let's just say it was a hit on you. It was one of those banks,

Kevin:

you know, community

Jeannene:

bank.

Kevin:

I have a friend, he's, he's dead now, he's a lovely man, his name was Kevin as well. Okay. Very pretty, very, very good looking, and he was tall with long, straight, dark hair. Anyway, he was a lovely man, and the drugs took him, which is a real shame. But I knew him before it became a real problem for any of us, although it was already a problem, I suppose. Anyway, that's another story. I'd often be with him, I can remember walking in Kent in the English countryside one morning and somebody else was there and said, Oh, Kevin, what's going on? I thought you already were seeing a woman and he said, Oh yeah, Nigel, I fall in love every day. And there's a thing that goes around with, I think it's more the men than the women in Narcotics Anonymous, which is, you know. I don't worry about it, you know, I have a, I'll fall in love and get divorced all in one day. Okay. It's just in your head. So, so I, I never know when that kind of thing happens. I've, I've, I've been known. To see someone looking at me, see a woman looking at me, and I'll stop to check it out. Is my zip undone? Is it something I forget to put shoes on or something? And then I'll walk away and I'll, oh

Jeannene:

no,

Kevin:

they were checking me out. You

Jeannene:

know how you've always wanted feedback from the podcast?

Kevin:

I do! I do want feedback!

Jeannene:

You might get a whole load of people going, I was born at ten past one in the morning also! Ha

Kevin:

ha

Jeannene:

ha ha ha!

Kevin:

The truth of it is, I don't know if it's that exact, but I do remember, And was

Jeannene:

she really born at 10 just one day? Yeah, I don't know. I did

Kevin:

think that too. And were those eyes checking me out while I was standing in the queue? Oh,

Jeannene:

is it a bank policy to connect with people however you do and just go, yes, I have a jumper the same as that one? Well, no, she doesn't. She wouldn't. I mean, look at this jumper. I don't know. Sometimes. Yeah, the way people connect anyway, what I was talking about when you're in a group.

Kevin:

Yeah

Jeannene:

Let's just go back a little bit. I

Kevin:

was just gonna point us that way too. Does that have nothing to do with it?

Jeannene:

No,

Kevin:

that was a complete aside Completely. I enjoyed it. Good. I enjoyed the experience and now I'd enjoyed talking about

Jeannene:

it

Kevin:

too

Jeannene:

When you're in a group,

Kevin:

yeah

Jeannene:

It's important to know if you're introverted or extroverted. Interesting thing. Why? Because if an extroverted person, let's Extroverted? I'm having an English issue. I can't English today. So, when someone is extroverted in a group,

Kevin:

Extroverted,

Jeannene:

yep. They will naturally they process externally. And so what happens is they start to talk and that's the way they work out things. So they use their talking in an extroverted way to discuss a problem or discuss what's actually happening and they haven't got it always sorted out. So they start talking, talking, talking, talking, talking. So that's the way they would interact with a group. But an introverted person They spend time considering what they'll say, considering the issue or the problem or the discussion, and when they've got something calculated and ready to say, they might go to say, uh, and say it, but what happens is the extroverted person has gone along and they've therefore said it, or they've talked over. Yeah. And there's no space. Yeah. And what ends up happening is the introverted person actually hasn't said anything. And the introverted person cannot say anything and the extroverted person has taken over the meeting. Is that anybody's fault? No.

Kevin:

No, but it's the stuff that we've been talking about, which is that as an introvert, We're able to rise, not rise above it or below it. It's able to be the opposite at times. Very much. Yeah. So you can do that. But I don't know how that applies in meetings because I, I think

Jeannene:

it's absolutely necessary.'cause if let's you think about it, but it's

Kevin:

difficult to do in meetings. Oh, absolutely. Yeah.

Jeannene:

What happens is the introvert needs to up their energy. Yeah. And they need to risk. interrupting, which is going to feel uncomfortable in order to be part of the discussion. And this can happen in any arena, whether it's socially or work related, they need to up their energy and speak and interrupt and risk making a mistake. There's an idea and the extroverted person where they can gain the same things. They need to lower their energy and pull back and learn to contain. And that's going to feel uncomfortable for them also. But if they don't contain, they'll only repeat what they know, and the risk is they won't hear other people's view. And so they won't really know if they've got the backing of other people. So there's things for all of us to do if you want a functional and a healthy space where discussion includes all people. If I'm thinking about my family, I want that. If I'm thinking about a group that I'm running, I want that. If I'm part of a group, I'm going to do the best for me. So knowing who I am and how I process is really important.'cause then I've got a strategy for me, and it's not that the extroverted person is aggressive, but if I don't know that I might think they are,

Kevin:

yeah,

Jeannene:

I might think they're passive aggressive and taking over. And the interesting thing they may be, they may not be. But the risk is, if I see them as that, I can feel like a victim on the tail end of this process and nobody's listening to me and I'm just going to sit here as a useless piece of crap. You know about that talk, Kevin.

Kevin:

That's the gnome. Yes, I think everybody's got a gnome. I've discovered, but as a recovering addict, when I stopped taking drugs, which happened to most people who stopped and stayed stopped, you know, stopping is actually the easiest bit, staying stopped is the work. So, you know, waking up in the morning and having an image, you know, like the gnomes are really awake, because being awake for ages is sitting at the end of the bed getting up and waiting for you, because I just wanted to tell you, all that stuff you did yesterday was absolutely shit. And I don't know why you bother getting out of bed, you might as well go back to bed. And if you were to do that, like, oh, I give up, I'm just going to have a dune a day. As soon as you did that, I go, what are you doing? You lazy bugger, why don't you get up and do something? So you've got the idea.

Jeannene:

So it traps you. You've

Kevin:

got the idea, yeah.

Jeannene:

Yeah. I think I certainly have heard you talk about those things that you tell. It gets a lot more

Kevin:

vicious.

Jeannene:

Yeah, that you've told yourself, but I haven't heard it expressed as a gnome.

Kevin:

It's like a, a persona, which is, it's a inner voice, really, that's what it is. The learning around that is to, ah, that's, that's, that's actually not me. That's just a thing that I've learnt to do, so I don't have to do it, and I can actually have a conversation with it, it's like, yeah, I hear you, but no, we're not going to do it, you know, and some of my peers go, yeah, why don't you fuck off and sit in the corner and do something else. But gradually over the years, I've realised that I can get better. Yeah, hello, yeah, here, yeah, why don't you join us? And we'll do something completely different. So it's like a melding, an integration. Yeah. And that's possible. Possible for me. And I've met other people, both in and out of recovery.

Jeannene:

So you're talking about an integration of the voice, is that what you mean?

Kevin:

Okay. Of that part, which I consider not me.

Jeannene:

Yeah.

Kevin:

To, uh, Richard was born for, of, in order to keep me safe as a child. Yeah. So actually ending up being able to go, well, what you're doing isn't useful, but there could be some other useful things if you want to join us rather than fight. Yeah.

Jeannene:

So you have that conversation with that part of you?

Kevin:

Yeah, okay.

Jeannene:

I might not call it an integration so much as an awareness. And it sounds like you're working with that part of yourself.

Kevin:

Yeah, always having your right, because always having to be aware that it's a possibility. Yeah, yeah. Coming home from something on my own, and I could be coming home from something. Like, Typically, if I was on my own and it was late at night, it would be being out with friends in a restaurant, coming home from a meeting, coming home from a gig where I've been taking photographs, probably had the most fantastic time, and most of the time that I'll work out, that I'll get home and do whatever and go to bed, but sometimes, before I've even got home, the gnome's there, and it's just, you know, gnawing on my ear and bashing me on the head, too. Yeah.

Jeannene:

So, I think When someone's an introvert, those parts become louder. I could be wrong around that, but that inner voice is louder because you're sitting with it and you're listening to it more often. Whereas the extrovert, they probably have their TIFFs with their self out in the open,

Music:

they probably make quite

Jeannene:

a bit of a mess of some relationships if they, if they open their mouth before they've engaged their mind.

Kevin:

Those sorts of things can happen. So

Jeannene:

let's hope I'm polite. I like to be,

Kevin:

I think, I think the trick for me, the trick for other people that I know that suffer from that. So that's typically in recovery is knowing that that's not actually you. So that's not an essential part of you. It's something learns.

Music:

Hmm.

Kevin:

And it was learned for a particular reason or reasons.

Jeannene:

Hmm.

Kevin:

Yeah.

Jeannene:

Okay.

Kevin:

Yeah.

Jeannene:

All right. I like to see it as a part of you, but a part, not all of, like you said before.

Kevin:

A facet, if you like. So it doesn't

Jeannene:

matter which view you take, actually. It doesn't.

Kevin:

Yeah.

Jeannene:

It's more about working with yourself.

Kevin:

I have to be aware that when it's engaged that I'm only going to engage with it on my terms. You know, the rest of me is going to say, yeah, you can be here, but not like that. And no, we're not going to do all of that. No, I'm not going to listen to all of those, those things. Take some work.

Jeannene:

So I guess you're talking about introverted parts of self.

Kevin:

If you think about

Jeannene:

that, and

Kevin:

then extroverted parts of self,

Jeannene:

there's extroverted parts of self. And I think again, like I think I said before, is we can have parts of both, but we're going to lean more to one side and some of us are going to be at way ends of the spectrum and all is okay. So long as you know that about yourself and are aware that if you don't speak up. That might be a comfortable place for you, or an uncomfortable place, and it's all okay. But it might be something that you could work on, something that you could be different with. I know, I had a story. When we lived in Sydney, we went to some neighbour's places. that invited us next door to a barbecue. So off we go to the barbecue and there was a whole group of people there and they were talking. I wasn't interested in what they were saying. They were talking perhaps about football, I'm not really sure, or rugby in New South Wales, and I'm not, uh, Football, rugby fan, sorry people. Anyway, they were having this conversation and I was bored. And it occurred to me that if I was bored, I could steer the conversation somewhere else. Because all the extroverted people, they didn't ask permission to talk about football or rugby, they just talked. Yep. And so I figured, oh! I don't have to ask permission, as I'm a more introverted person, I don't have to ask permission, I could just speak up and change the subject. And I thought, what do I want to do here? And so I thought, at one stage, the group of people were talking about that they'd never been in our house, because we'd not long moved there. And they were talking about the people that lived there before. And so I said, Okay, would anyone like a tour of my place? Let's go. And they went, Oh, yes. And we all got up. The party went down the road to our house, went through our house. And then we came back. But what I established is myself as a person who could speak up when I needed to. And that was a really good thing for me. And I can think about another time when that occurred. And then I realized that when I changed the subject, there were other people in the room that were more interested in what I was talking about than the Current subject football that they'd maybe been sitting there going. I'm bored as well Yeah, or I I am not invested in this topic and so when I change the topic people look to me and I went Oh I can change the subject when I want, there's a thought. And then I realised that the skills that I learned in group work, as in running a group, were transferable. I didn't know that.

Kevin:

And from what you just said, you did that without any conflict. Because I remember when I first started to do that in meetings, I would say things like I'm sorry to interrupt and then just carry on talking. And it's aggressive. I didn't realize it was aggressive. Rather than just saying. Well, actually, can we talk about this and whatever and go, you know,

Music:

go off

Kevin:

to where I wanted to go. It took me a long time to not have to interrupt like that and apologize for it.

Jeannene:

I think it's a learning curve, Kevin. Sometimes, if you're not used to it, sometimes it's going to come up more abrupt, unfortunately. If you're not used to it,

Kevin:

but it's a risk. It's going to give the person who's been speaking, the extrovert, that little bit of footage to go, well, actually, you did interrupt. Or whatever it is, however they're going to be. So, without conflict is, like you just said, sliding in. Yeah.

Jeannene:

And changing

Kevin:

the subject.

Jeannene:

I think that was easier for me in the sense that I had been very passive. And so I don't think there was any part of me that was going to be aggressive. I was scared of doing that and uncomfortable with that. Uh, my own critic would give me a hard time about being aggressive. Oh, you've

Kevin:

got a critic too.

Jeannene:

Yeah. It's

Kevin:

not a gnome.

Jeannene:

It's not a gnome. Yours may be a gnome. I don't know why I picked a gnome. I know.

Kevin:

It's just, I had this image of it sitting on the You know, the foot of the bed is perched there like a bird, but with a moon's body, with a hat on it, with a really grumpy looking face.

Jeannene:

Okay. Ugh.

Kevin:

Just what you wouldn't want to face first thing in the morning. Yeah.

Jeannene:

No, often when I've done something or spoken up within a group, it's been quite, you know, Considered.

Music:

Okay.

Jeannene:

And I tend to have been the person who's had a well thought out view and I'm giving myself much more permission these days just to speak out and let it be as it needs to be.

Kevin:

So, this is not about being an introvert or an extrovert but I meant to say this earlier but, but I think both you and I once or twice in in this session have referred to something which we're not sure was there because we had many abortive attempts including one which wasn't an abortive attempt to start. The actual software that we used decided to go, whoop, blip, gonna throw that away. It did. And we lost what we were doing. So yeah. And I was going to mention something else and now I've forgotten what it was, but it doesn't

Jeannene:

matter. Did you just extrovert all over?

Kevin:

Yes, I think I did.

Jeannene:

Yeah, I

Kevin:

did, didn't I? All right. That was me.

Jeannene:

It was disappointing to lose some of our discussion that we had. It flowed really well.

Kevin:

It was really good, but I think we did really good again, but you know, all those people writing in and phoning and stuff like that and sending email. You do realize that we've got a fan mail there that you can actually click a button and send us a message. When we get thousands of those of which we've currently got zero.

Jeannene:

That's not true. My cousin sent some feedback.

Kevin:

Oh, that's on your, that's an SMS to you?

Jeannene:

No, it was Instagram.

Kevin:

Oh, was it? Yeah. Oh, that's some feedback. We've got so many ways you could leave feedback people, and you've got a friend who gives us regular feedback too. That's

Jeannene:

wonderful. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It is great. Yeah.

Kevin:

Keeps us on our toes.

Jeannene:

So we've got two lots of feedback.

Kevin:

So,

Jeannene:

well, I get some. No, that's not true. I get

Kevin:

some feedback from family and close friends. But, you know, family, they have to say it's great, don't they?

Jeannene:

No, they don't.

Kevin:

Okay, friends.

Jeannene:

No, they don't.

Kevin:

Okay. No, they wouldn't be friends if they did. No, I know. I like

Jeannene:

that kind of friendship. That's really authentic and it really tells me what it is. That's why we're friends.

Kevin:

Yeah. Well, is it?

Jeannene:

Because you tell me like it is. What did you do that for, Janine? Why would you do it that way? What happened when you said it that way?

Kevin:

We don't always agree with each other.

Jeannene:

No.

Kevin:

You're having, you're having a thing earlier in the kitchen. Oh, you've lost your glasses. Which is something that we both do, we've both got light glasses, so you know, if you put them down it's hard to see them again. And, you're in the kitchen and you're, I don't know if you were still searching for the glasses, but you were describing yourself as a crazy woman. No you're not! Oh, well, maybe you are, but then I am as well.

Jeannene:

You're a crazy woman?

Kevin:

No, crazy man.

Jeannene:

What do you know? It doesn't matter. I just felt like that in that moment. Yeah. Uh, crazy person, because I was having a A day. I was having a day. You

Kevin:

were.

Jeannene:

Sometimes you can have a great day. Sometimes you just have a day.

Kevin:

I'd arrived two hours earlier, you thought. Asha was pushing buttons saying she wanted to play, go for a walk, all sorts of other things. I

Jeannene:

misread your text. Yeah, that was

Kevin:

funny.

Jeannene:

I know. I got

Kevin:

here and was led into the house by Greg and, uh, he didn't say anything about that. So I sat in the kitchen. She told me that you were. on your way back from the shops and you got came in and said oh you're two hours early or 2 30 or something can i make 12 30 i

Jeannene:

could have told you to go away and then come back later yeah this is not what we agreed

Kevin:

and i would have got my phone out and gone 12 30 look and i

Jeannene:

pulled out my phone and i went Oh, 12. 30, you were right. But no, I wasn't

Kevin:

100%. I said, okay, it's 12. 30, okay. And you said, yes, 2. 30 is. So you didn't read my message carefully enough, and I didn't read your message carefully enough.

Jeannene:

That's friendship.

Kevin:

Yes. All right.

Jeannene:

I hope you've gotten something from the podcast today, people. It's been fun chatting with you, Kevin, and telling our listeners a little bit of what we know. That's the thing you were going to say is we're just opening the door. The box to. Oh, that's right. Yeah.

Kevin:

We haven't solved anything here.

Jeannene:

No,

Kevin:

we haven't tried to. We're not trying to teach. We're rather learning. And so I always feel like when I think it's, it's good, which is mostly I do think it's good. I feel like we've just opened the box. We've just started.

Jeannene:

That's what I want, actually. I want to open the box for everyone so that they can continue with the conversations they can add to. They can disagree with. within your own circles or have that conversation with us in the future. We are talking about in the future having some guests on and we'd love to have some guests that we can chat to.

Kevin:

I found one. Forgotten who it is now.

Jeannene:

Maybe we'll talk about that later.

Kevin:

Oh, okay. Right. Yeah.

Jeannene:

And so now it's time to say goodbye. Oh,

Kevin:

okay. See ya. No, that's not how we do it.

Jeannene:

Oh,

Kevin:

Oh,

Jeannene:

here we go again.

Kevin:

I really enjoyed it. It was really, really lovely. I hope you're all having a wonderful, wonderful day. Goodbye. See you next time. Is that it? Done.

Jeannene:

Those sentiments. Yep. And we're done.

Kevin:

Bye.

Jeannene:

Bye people.

People on this episode